#ummm. ya. fun times 👍 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

pulchrasilva · 1 year ago

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Sigh I need to rant about certain people and how there is a background noise of discomfort with every interaction after particular incidents that made me go "bitch you live like this???" but all my typical vent spaces are ones where they might see it and the only ones that they wouldn't see it in are like discord channels that are not for this topic of vent or friends who would be uncomfortable with the topic etc like,,, what do I even do? Stew in it?

#catch me very carefully not saying any details about them or the incidents because i dont want them to knowww #i suddenly understand so much better why my dad stays friends with people who are racist/islamophobic to his face #like yeah theyre fun to talk to and they enjoy the same silly shows as me #qnd when were not talking about The Things its easy to forget about The Incidents #but every conversation feels like im hiding part of myself. it feels like if i stop hiding I'll be crucified #theyre fucking scary bro wtf. i didnt know people like that were real that was always abstract fandom drama stuff #and its not THAT scary but also im terrified after only brief glimpses it could be so much worse but if we dont talk about it I'll never #need to know #im like. king of letting go of the incident anf never talking about it but endlessly rotating it and stewing in it and holding a grudge #ummm. ya. fun times 👍#shout out to my brother for letting me talk about it though they're cool as fuck for that #i need more non-white friends who arent online #or at least arent online in the same circles as these people #tbf i need more non-white friends full stop 😭#i need more friends who are freaks also #if i dont go 'theres something wrong with you' at least once a week then theres something wrong #wait that sounds funny lmao #but yeah i need people who are weird and gross and disturbing. not people who are normal with rancid vibes #uhh whatever. I'll get over it <- lying #vent post #if you're wondering if this post is about you it's probably not. probably #sobbing i hate vagueposting it's so mean but what else do i do here #gotta start making people fill out a questionnaire before i allow them so deep into my life istg

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